Let It Go

The internet is a great place for finding memes and inspiring photos that tell you to let things go.  I particularly like the one with the butterfly holding onto a large pile or stone.  It’s a great reminder for a much more challenging thing to do.  Of course people let things go all the time.  You get over traffic.  You get over the $0.50 coupon that someone forgot to ring up.  You get over the occasionally (but not regularly) loud neighbor.  You get over the friend who forgot to call you back.  You get over yourself when you ran late.  But it’s just not easy to get over or let go of the big things or things that really matter.

You may have noticed my blog has shifted towards finding peace and now letting go.  It’s part of my current narrative.  I really am trying to do this – and I probably should have a long time ago, but I wasn’t ready.  And now I am.  And being ready for change is a positive that I want to highlight.  Struggling through things is real.  Maybe during the struggle, we aren’t always positive, but the act or risk to get there is.

So if you’re also struggling upwards, struggling inwards, or transitioning through something/anything and having a bit of a difficult time, take a moment to recognize the positive.  You’re trying.  This is hard.  You’re probably doing a much better job of it than you are giving yourself credit.  And you’re still trying while it is still hard.  That is noble.  That is life.  And there will be more of it.

Letting things go has always been harder for me.  I remember.  I document.  I feel an inflamed sense of social justice when it’s a bigger-than-me-issue.  I’ve really been trying to get through the system, to find justice, and it’s just not going to happen.  So for me, it’s about letting it go.  I can’t give this any more of my time, my energy, my mental health, and my physical health.  Saying “no” and “I quit” sometimes is the only choice – to let it go – to move on and make my way to a better life.  But it’s hard.

My reality is this pile.

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And it spans a timeline of well over a year.  And the other reality is that while I’m ready to let it go, it’s not done with me.  I still have physical pain.  I may need further medical intervention at some point.  And the system that has sent all these papers doesn’t take no or refusing to participate as an option, so they keep calling and sending me mail.  That’s hard to accept and still let go of that pile.

So what makes it easier to let go?

Well, let me know if you find out.  I’ve come to terms with there not being a one-size-fits-all-answer.  It’s taken me over a year but I’m finally ready to change something, and letting go is really the only thing I have control over.  And now that I am trying to let it go, I have to work on changing my story.  How do I do that?

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Put a dinosaur in it.

No, this isn’t saying to find your ancient history and insert it into the narrative.  I mean literally change the image (your perspective) that you keep seeing.  My current story is so ridiculous (and yet so true), that a silly dinosaur from a dollar store seems fitting.  I need to find humor to ease all the emotions I’m trying to let go that are stuck in this pile.  There’s a lot of anger, and it’s just hard to be angry when you’re laughing.  And maybe if you can laugh, you can smile and see that there’s more than just anger out there.  And you have it in you.

And if I can try working on this and try letting it go, maybe you can have some hope for whatever you’re trying to let go, too, because I can be really stubborn.

So for anyone who has rewritten their story and let things go, what’s been helpful for you?

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One thought on “Let It Go

  1. Pingback: Shifting the Narrative | intentional acts of kindness

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