I’m still in shock today. I know a lot of us are.
I’m still exhausted. I’m still unrelentingly busy with work. I’m still catsitting. I’m still going out of town to visit someone. I’m still my values. I’m still a daughter and sister. I’m still short. I’m still blogging. I’m still emailing. I’m still there for my friends. I’m still my beliefs. I’m still chuckling with co-workers. I’m still saying hi to strangers. I’m still quiet on public transportation. I’m still thinking. I’m still running errands. I’m still walking. I’m still smiling. I’m still losing the battle in socks versus washing machine.
I’m still everything but still.
I’m trying to get to still, so that I can reflect more before deciding how I want to be a part of moving forward. Not just in the big picture – but even the day to day. I’m still trying to figure out how to give myself more time – just for myself, not my co-workers, friends, family, or even that cat I’m watching after – to figure out what I need.
And once I figure that out, the harder thing that I need to do, is ask for what I need. From myself – but harder, from others. A good friend of mine today sent me an email update about her life, and in it, stated that all she wanted was a certain kind of cookies. She didn’t even directly ask me for them, but it made me realize how easy it is to just put out there what you need from someone else. And how easy it can be to give that request.
Cookies, or other small things, can represent comfort, thoughtfulness, a reminder that someone cares. It can be the sugar or energy boost you need to get through a long day (or week). It can be the stress-food that makes a difficult moment (day, week, life transition, etc.) a little better. And sometimes we just need to clarify what that small thing is that we need – and put it out there for someone else to help fulfill it.
Ask. Receive. Give.
So I implore you to give yourself some time and think about what you need – and to make a direct ask. Getting help, comfort, validation, love, etc. from others may be easier than we realize. And maybe knowing that for next time will make it a little easier to ask again.